A Monster Under My Bed

The last couple nights, I’ve been half-awoken by a scratching sound in my room. I worried that it might be mice in the walls or something, but assumed I was imagining it and didn’t worry too much about it.

Last night, I was sitting on my bed, reading, when something black, multi-legged, and HUGE dashed out from under my bed and across the floor. It stopped to rest in front of my bookcase, so when I overcame the shock, I approached it for a closer look. Now, I had already removed my contact lenses, and I’m very nearly blind without them, so I couldn’t get close enough to see the monster without actually touching it, and that just wasn’t gonna happen. But I leaned in as close as comfort would allow, and the horrible thing suddenly took off running TOWARDS me. I almost died of heart attack. It took me a long time to catch my breath after that, and then I had to work up the nerve to walk over near it again, and grab my most textbook-like book off my bookshelf (“America” by the Daily Show staff.) I then took a good five-minutes to work up the nerve to throw the book onto the rotten creature, but the thing scuttled out of the way just as the book landed. It went and hid in another bookcase, where I couldn’t reach it, so I had to go to bed knowing there was a disgusting beast lying in wait for me. Of course, I couldn’t fall asleep then, so I lay in bed praying it would stay put and not decide to crawl all over me in my sleep. As I’m trying to force myself to think of other things (raindrops on roses and all that), I hear the scratching sound of movement I’ve been hearing for the last few nights. GREAT! I don’t have mice, just the hugest spider I’ve ever seen in my life, not including tarantulas. Needless to say, my sleep was fitful at best.

So now I’m trying to get up and start my day, but I’m afraid to do anything! I certainly can’t spend any time in my bedroom, but every dark spot on the wall or carpet that I see in any room of the house, I mistake for a spider. And I’m paranoid I have spiders crawling all over me. Ick. I’m gonna go sit in my car with the doors locked and sob. See y’all later.